Three years ago today!

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Probably the best decision I ever made.

That’s right, Dragons and Dragonette’s; it’s October 20th! Three years ago today, the Dragoness and I stood on the altar at Holy Name Catholic Church in her home town of Vermilion, Alberta, said “I do,” put rings on each other’s left hand…and with those outward professions and actions declared our marriage to one another. (I’d say that the priest “pronounced” us “man and wife,” but that’s not how it actually works.)

Three years, already…it seems, at times, as though they’ve raced past. Granted, having a child like Dragonlet #1, who at times seems to be the physical manifestation of motion itself, would tend to have that effect. I seem to recall that our first year or so as a married couple went by at a quite reasonable pace, in our cozy little apartment not far outside of Edmonton’s downtown core. It’s a pity we had to leave it behind, and thus leave behind the little tea shop, the ice cream shop, and all the other little places we liked to retreat to as well. (That too is an effect of having kids, at least in Edmonton; there are some properties that will refuse to rent to you. Bollocks to that, I say.)

Don’t let anyone tell you, Dragons and Dragonettes, that marriage isn’t a challenge; it most certainly is, or rather it most certainly is a series of challenges, some short-term and some ongoing. Chesterton said it best: “The whole pleasure of marriage is that it is a perpetual crisis.” Equally, however, don’t let anyone tell you that marriage isn’t immensely rewarding, and among the greatest of gifts that one can both give and receive in one’s life. At the core of marriage is giving, the giving of the totality and sum of oneself to another person, and then just that person.

Marriage is more than just a legal arrangement; at its core, it has a Spiritual quality that sanctifies and blesses the married couple, making their union into something more magnificent than just the sum of two people. Sacrifice is necessary in marriage, and the need for Honor and Honesty are absolute. Though marriage and the intimacy of a couple is not a war or a battle of wills, marriage should be approached and committed to with Valor, a strength of mind and soul that enables one to encounter everything with firm resolve. Marriage should inspire Compassion, make one thirst to both seek Justice for one’s spouse and be in all things Just with her. Marriage requires both spouses to act, toward each other, with Humility.

There must be, in other words, Truth, Courage, and Love in marriage, without question. I know, for myself, that I have not always lived up to this standard in how I have approached my marriage to my lovely Dragoness; she, on the other hand, has tended to live up to it in how she has approached me. For that, I can really only be grateful.

And I am.

6 Responses

  1. Shadow of Light says:

    Congratulations! 🙂

  2. Natreg says:

    Congratulations.

    That was a great way of explaining what marriage is.

    The only thing that really bothered me there was what you said about those properties in Edmonton… How can they refuse to rent to someone with kids is stupid…
    I haven’t seen anything like that in Spain (which doesn’t mean that it could not happen too).

  3. Severian says:

    Congratulations!

  4. Handshakes says:

    Big congrats!

  5. wtf_dragon says:

    Thanks everyone!

    @Natreg: In Edmonton, bylaws permit “adults only” (sounds dirty, I know) apartment and condominium complexes. We really liked the place we were in, small though it was (~850 square feet), but we were obligated under the lease to move out once we had Dragonlet #1. Not that they punted us to the street the moment she was born; they let us stay the three-ish months we had left on the lease, but they wouldn’t let us renew the lease thereafter.

    “Adults only” buildings are not permitted in some Canadian cities, but are permitted in others. If I really wanted to make a mess of things, I’d take the issue to a human rights tribunal and claim that the practice, where it is practiced, is fundamentally discriminatory…but since I tend to disagree with the way Canadian human rights tribunals operate, I haven’t gone that route (and won’t).

    It worked out for the better, in the end; the place we are in now is larger, nicely appointed, and close to many amenities. Dragonlet #1 gets her own room, and there was an extra room which is slowly being converted into Dragonlet #2’s. Our little apartment was…well…little, one bedroom really. It would have lasted us through Dragonlet #1’s “crib phase”, but really wouldn’t have worked for us once she got into her “big girl” bed (which happened last month).